3-1-0
That’s right! 3-1-0
Well, my beautiful Atlanta Falcons have done it again, demolishing Minnesota 30 to 10. That’s three touchdowns and three field goals wham bam thank you very much beat that you no good crap mongers.
Unfortunately we have to play the reigning gods of the Superbowl New England this Sunday, and we probably won’t win. Not cos we’re crap or anything, just that what with all Michael Vick’s recent… ahem… unpleasantness. That said, the way NE are playing right now, we might just give them a royal ass whupping, plus we’re playing at home. That’s right. Atlanta 3-1, NE 2-2. Suck on that Rodney Harrison and Kevin Faulk.
Anyways, what a season the NFL is shaping up to be! Jacksonville, Cincinnati, and Tampa Bay all undefeated thus far and going 4-0 is good. Very good. Which is weird. Those are the kind of teams that did NOT make playoffs last year. Another surprise chef contender is Miami, who are sitting at the top of their division looking swanky because of the biggest upset of all - New England have done an ancient Rome on us and cracked from the inside. Let’s hope that trend continues this week. They just took their first home ground loss in 1015 days. All thanks to the Chargers. Who are also hot property.
Enough football, it’s just that it’s so boring in between sport seasons here. Maybe Australia vs. World XI cricket will make it better.
Exams are still hard, had history today. That was gruelling, there was more writing than an English paper, stupid Khrushchev.
There are these awesome berry chewy muesli bar things, I dunno what they’re called, but I’m addicted.
Speaking of berry, I saw the absolute funniest movie I’ve seen in ages the other night, and it was all a little something called “The Country Bears.”
If you missed it, which most would have because it was billed as a children’s film, then I’ll bust out the premise, storyline and funniest moments for you. First of all, the deal is there was this band called the Country Bears, who were country rock gods, but they’ve long broken up for the usual reasons. One unusual thing is that they actually all are bears. Life size bears. This would be ok if it was an animated film, or if everyone in that movie were bears, or talking animals, but it was JUST THEM. JUST 6 GUYS IN HUGE BEAR SUITS! And the best bit of all, was that nobody made mention of the fact they were bears. Nobody found it strange that they were actually bears, and better yet, a human woman, in a completely human family, didn’t find it at all weird that she gave birth to a bear cub. NOR DID THE HUSBAND. If my wife gave birth and it didn’t look like me, I’d go for the lawyers, if it wasn’t the same species as me, I’d go for the shotgun.
Anyways, so this kid bear tries to encourage the country bears to get back together because he loves their music, and they’re gonna knock down bear hall, some music place. Here’s where is gets great.
The bank manager who wants to knock the place down is played by, of all people, Christopher Walken, the most serious, straight faced, light footed evil man on the planet, and he played this nutcase who plans to drop a stereotypical 50 tonne triangular weight on the bear’s hall. To stop this happening the bears throw a reunion concert and heart-warmingly go around collecting the old members. It’s also a musical. With Elton John. Did I mention that? Well it just gets nuttier.
So they call up their old promoter, who is long out of work, and gets him to promote the show. All well and good until the camera zooms out and he’s sitting at a desk in an office supply store where a clerk is asking him to stop doing that. Comic gold!
There’s also a fat bear called Big Al, who’s obsessed with people staying off his grass, who’s best line is telling the policemen where they can find him. “Here… or jus’ over there… or sometimes by that tree for a bit.”
Oh, and a roadie called Roadie. AND THE POLICEMEN! They had these two cops that were after the bears for some reason, I think cos they thought they kidnapped Berry, the kid bear, and they were these hilarious guys.
“Will you find our son?” “Ma’am, we’ll do more than that.” Pause. “How can we do more than that? What are we gonna do, find him twice? Let’s go.”
“Let’s get mobile.” “Why can’t you just say, ‘let’s go,’ or ‘c’mon’ why always ‘Let’s get mobile?”
“Suspicious activity at two o’clock.” “How can you know that?”
So if you get the chance to see it, do. It’s got a good soundtrack too. And a hot waitress.
Well, more later. I’m gonna go bathe in vegetable oil, then dive onto a half pipe.
Stay erotic, wherever you are.
Well, my beautiful Atlanta Falcons have done it again, demolishing Minnesota 30 to 10. That’s three touchdowns and three field goals wham bam thank you very much beat that you no good crap mongers.
Unfortunately we have to play the reigning gods of the Superbowl New England this Sunday, and we probably won’t win. Not cos we’re crap or anything, just that what with all Michael Vick’s recent… ahem… unpleasantness. That said, the way NE are playing right now, we might just give them a royal ass whupping, plus we’re playing at home. That’s right. Atlanta 3-1, NE 2-2. Suck on that Rodney Harrison and Kevin Faulk.
Anyways, what a season the NFL is shaping up to be! Jacksonville, Cincinnati, and Tampa Bay all undefeated thus far and going 4-0 is good. Very good. Which is weird. Those are the kind of teams that did NOT make playoffs last year. Another surprise chef contender is Miami, who are sitting at the top of their division looking swanky because of the biggest upset of all - New England have done an ancient Rome on us and cracked from the inside. Let’s hope that trend continues this week. They just took their first home ground loss in 1015 days. All thanks to the Chargers. Who are also hot property.
Enough football, it’s just that it’s so boring in between sport seasons here. Maybe Australia vs. World XI cricket will make it better.
Exams are still hard, had history today. That was gruelling, there was more writing than an English paper, stupid Khrushchev.
There are these awesome berry chewy muesli bar things, I dunno what they’re called, but I’m addicted.
Speaking of berry, I saw the absolute funniest movie I’ve seen in ages the other night, and it was all a little something called “The Country Bears.”
If you missed it, which most would have because it was billed as a children’s film, then I’ll bust out the premise, storyline and funniest moments for you. First of all, the deal is there was this band called the Country Bears, who were country rock gods, but they’ve long broken up for the usual reasons. One unusual thing is that they actually all are bears. Life size bears. This would be ok if it was an animated film, or if everyone in that movie were bears, or talking animals, but it was JUST THEM. JUST 6 GUYS IN HUGE BEAR SUITS! And the best bit of all, was that nobody made mention of the fact they were bears. Nobody found it strange that they were actually bears, and better yet, a human woman, in a completely human family, didn’t find it at all weird that she gave birth to a bear cub. NOR DID THE HUSBAND. If my wife gave birth and it didn’t look like me, I’d go for the lawyers, if it wasn’t the same species as me, I’d go for the shotgun.
Anyways, so this kid bear tries to encourage the country bears to get back together because he loves their music, and they’re gonna knock down bear hall, some music place. Here’s where is gets great.
The bank manager who wants to knock the place down is played by, of all people, Christopher Walken, the most serious, straight faced, light footed evil man on the planet, and he played this nutcase who plans to drop a stereotypical 50 tonne triangular weight on the bear’s hall. To stop this happening the bears throw a reunion concert and heart-warmingly go around collecting the old members. It’s also a musical. With Elton John. Did I mention that? Well it just gets nuttier.
So they call up their old promoter, who is long out of work, and gets him to promote the show. All well and good until the camera zooms out and he’s sitting at a desk in an office supply store where a clerk is asking him to stop doing that. Comic gold!
There’s also a fat bear called Big Al, who’s obsessed with people staying off his grass, who’s best line is telling the policemen where they can find him. “Here… or jus’ over there… or sometimes by that tree for a bit.”
Oh, and a roadie called Roadie. AND THE POLICEMEN! They had these two cops that were after the bears for some reason, I think cos they thought they kidnapped Berry, the kid bear, and they were these hilarious guys.
“Will you find our son?” “Ma’am, we’ll do more than that.” Pause. “How can we do more than that? What are we gonna do, find him twice? Let’s go.”
“Let’s get mobile.” “Why can’t you just say, ‘let’s go,’ or ‘c’mon’ why always ‘Let’s get mobile?”
“Suspicious activity at two o’clock.” “How can you know that?”
So if you get the chance to see it, do. It’s got a good soundtrack too. And a hot waitress.
Well, more later. I’m gonna go bathe in vegetable oil, then dive onto a half pipe.
Stay erotic, wherever you are.
posted by Cal Samson at 2:39 PM
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